How to manage former colleagues when you’re promoted
Megan shares top tips on how to approach this common situation; when you’re promoted and are now managing your former colleagues.
You did it, you finally managed to score that promotion, the next step in your career. The only problem is you’re now managing your peers, perhaps one of them even went for the same job as you but didn’t get it.
This can present a challenging dynamic for you to manage now within your team. The shift from peer to manager can be a really tricky one to navigate. We’re going to share some of our experiences and top tips with you about how you can approach the situation.
Have an open and honest conversation: this can be tricky and may feel uncomfortable but could be invaluable in the long run. It might be that you aware that someone else in your team went for the same role. You have been successful in securing this leaving the other person feeling a little disgruntled perhaps. The easiest away to address this difficult situation could be simply calling it out. Especially if you’re now managing this individual, could you have a chat about how they’re feeling, listen to any of their concerns and then share with them how you’re planning on approaching the situation. Whilst this may feel uncomfortable for you, it is likely that it will clear the air. And if it doesn’t, and the individual continues to be difficult, you will know that you’ve done all you can to improve the relationship between you.
Don’t apologise: it is widely reported that women often tend to be more apologetic in situations such as these compared to men. So remember you don’t need to apologise for securing this new role. You will have gotten this because you deserve it. You will have worked hard to prove yourself and will have the knowledge and experience to do this role. The decision to give you this role with have been made by others in the company, so you have nothing to apologise for. If you do apologise, this can undermine both your credibility but also confidence, you need to believe you should be in this role - this confidence will show otherwise you risk planting a seed of doubt in others minds about whether you deserve the role or are capable of doing it.
Confidence: in these types of situations, your confidence might be being tested but we know from personal experience that regardless of how you’re feeling internally you need to draw on everything you can to present a confident and self assured presence. If you don’t believe that you should have the job, why are those people now being led by you in your team going to believe in you. You have to believe in yourself - those who interviewed you and offered you the job believed you could do it. Now you have to believe in yourself.
Building allies: you have got one or two people in your team which you’re worried about, are they causing disruption or challenging your ideas in front of the whole team? You’re trying your best to listen to their ‘concerns’ so you don’t sound defensive but perhaps it’s starting to really disrupt your team dynamics. In these situations we’ve found it helpful to think about who your allies are within your team. Do you have some people in your team that you’re able to share your ideas with ahead of the team meeting to get their thoughts and reactions, so that you can discuss these 1:1. You may then find when you share with the wider team, you have more voices of support behind your ideas to counteract the negative noises.
Making changes to your team: this may sound drastic but don’t be afraid when able to make changes to your team. Be considered about the changes that you make and you don’t want to be seen to be making changes for the sake of it or to try to assert your authority. Simple changes from when, where, or how you meet with your team through to recruiting new individuals can have a massive impact on both how you are regarded by your team but also the support that you will have from the team once you have some control over who is in your team.
We know this is a difficult situation to manage as we have both been there ourselves within our careers, but if you take nothing else away it is to ensure that you have confidence in yourself - everything else will follow.